What is a friend?

I have always been an all or nothing kind of girl when it comes to my friendships. Maybe I have too high of expectations of what a friend is? But, I always end up feeling silly for offering my desire to hang out or whatever after the 10th invite and no results.
What made me think that friends should be there for you and have the desire to be there? What made me this way? Maybe its because as I child I was let down a lot? My brothers would call (they are all a lot older than I) and say they were going to come get me to go out....and I would wait by the window for hours and they would never come (this isnt the case anymore as we are now adults). I love my brothers, but I felt let down on many occasions.
Maybe this is why I give so much to those I think are friends....cause I don't want them to feel like I don't care???
Someone recently told me that I make friends with people that I am so much better than.... that I sell myself short. But, what is wrong with caring about someone and wanting to help them out? I know that someone will only change if they have the desire to change....but what is so wrong with offering my 2 cents?
I am sorry about this post... I am just coming to the realization that my family are the ones that will always be there.... not a friend. My family will always support and love me, and I am so grateful for that...that I have a good family that cares.
I just need to let go, be myself and keep my family close.

Life is good

Its been a while since I last blogged.
Since this is about my journey, I will tell you that life is good so I will tell you a little bit about whats been happening.

I just moved to Central Utah to work on myself, enjoy the mountains and outdoor activites before I move back up North. Its really tough for me being in a small town without a lot of freinds and not having a job where I can get my social time in.
I said that I was going to take this summer to build my confidence back up after all the drama that took place in St George, and I have become more content with myself.
I took up cooking and baking, which is something I have never enjoyed or done a lot of. Its so rewarding when I throw together a dinner from scratch or bake a sheet of cookies and they come out tasting wonderful and others agree.  I also started making jewelry with my natural stones for people I love and to sell once I have enough made. I also took time developing my art by drawing.
I didnt go to church here except for the first week I moved down and just last week, its not that I do not want to go... I just stay up to late working on the things I have talked about above and end up sleeping in. I will say that I notice a HUGE difference in my week when I do ro do not go to church and thats why I decided that I cannot miss out on it anymore. Our meetings at church are so uplifting and I know that when I attend I come away with a goal of wanting to be better the coming week, and not having those spiritual goals tends to make the week a little tough.
I think we are so blessed to be a part of this gospel. How amazing is it that we can go to church and by partaking of the sacrament we renew our baptizimal covenants and come away knowing all the things we have struggled with during the week are washed away once again.
I am so blessed to have this summer to work on myself and spend my time connecting with my family. My family means everything to me and the time I spent living n St George and being so far away has made me appreciate and love them so much more than I have before.... and this is why I am moving up North this summer instead of going back down to St George. It will be great to live back up there with two of my brothers and all of my extended family.
I want to share my expereince of how I knew I was going to serve a mission, so I will post about that in the near future.